Time machine, please take me back to...

If you have a time machine, which era would you like to go back to?

I would wish to go back to 2004. When the kids were so adorbs. I would be kinder to J. I think I had been very harsh to him. I would not have forced him to sleep on his own right before A was born. For the life of me, I could still vividly remember how I had threatened him, how mean I was. My poor baby, all on his own at nights. Sometimes I wonder if it had been the cause for his sometimes needy self. If I could turn back time, I want to hug them to sleep, fall asleep together, wake up together and spend more time together. The joy of motherhood. I would still want to do it all over again, however many times I feel so failed in my parenting journey. I would want to read to them more, make them love books. I would get them to cook in the kitchen with me more, never mind the mess that they create. I wish. I wish....

Macao some years back

Horrors of poor quality camera!

I can't even remember which year we went to Macao.

After Macao, we did Gold Coast which was in 2018, I think.

Funny, life. Now that the kids are all in their own world, the relationship with hubby takes a turn for the better. It's like we pay more attention to each other, love more and enjoy being together more. Seldom have us fighting and arguing anymore. Not that it was often previously though. I think having children is a hurdle to relationships. It really takes patience and tolerance to past this stage. At one time, I was tempted to look for love and attention elsewhere. Being busy with kids and family does make you feel like unloved, unappreciated and unnoticed. Now that the kids do not need us so much, we have more time and energy to look. Me at him, him at me. So I want to tell young couples this. No matter how loveless you feel towards your spouse, it is worth the time and effort to rekindle, rework the relationship than having a new one. Patience is virtue. Now I'm creating memories. Making him put lotion on my back for me. Fighting for the pillowy. Waking up in the middle of the night being totally contented having him beside me.